Originally published by emphelan
My life, my house, my children are in various states of chaos. These days when I am suppose to write about parenting or household subjects, I find myself lacking in items to share. My husband and I, our parenting skills are what some people call organic. We had children young, we weren’t prepared, my husband comes from a severely abusive household, and I have always lacked the correct maturity. We probably allow our children to get away with more than we should, but no one is hurt, they are all rather sharp, and happy most of the time. They are polite, say ma’am and sir, hold doors open, allow the girls to board the bus first. . . they are old school gentlemen. But they do fight, and rough house, and behave like the typical boy. I so need a mud room.
My house is always in a constant state of a tornado victim. Either we are gutting a room, rearranging a room, or my boys have overran a room. Currently we are dealing with all the above and my going through things. My organization skills are lacking.
Right now our chaos is encircled with the fact that we are down grading homes. As my regular readers know, my family of 5 is moving from a 3 bedroom, 2 bath mobile home on 5 acres, into a single room ( not bedroom, read ROOM) camper on 120 acres. Eventually we will move into a 2 bedroom house, with a total of 7 people. And some day a new house of our own on the land. We have to condense 12 years of togetherness to fit our new accomodations. The stress that this is creating is close to engulfing our lives. But in the chaos we find moment of clarity, like my middle son’s enthusiasm to hunt bobcat with his long bow once we move.
I am probably the last person that should ever give advice to others on parenting and household skills. But I do know when I see the chaos get out of control in other peoples parenting. We have some how found a way to be in the midst of chaos yet have the structure we need to fill our boys lives with the important lessons and the love they need. I do not allow the chaos to cause me to neglect my boys, nor my husband.
If you find yourself in the middle of chaos, don’t forget that things are not as important as you family. And if those things seem to be pushing your family out of the picture, becoming too important, get rid of them. Things are not worth loosing your closeness with your family over.
In any chaos is a glimmer of structure, no matter how small it might be, grasp it and hold on tight. The insanity might swirl in madness around you, but your children and love ones will be an anchor if you so allow.